[FUNd]

I swear this actually happened, I asked a merchant to send me rent checks, this was maybe 2 years ago.. He neglected to tell me he paid cash. What this genius does is take the $800 or so and put it on a copy machine, made a copy of the money and then faxed me the picture of the cash. You would think this story could not get more ridiculous but no it does. To get to the $800 or so that was his rent included $10 in quarters. I really wish I can find the picture.

Sean Murray, might need you to back me up on this one because the story is that ridiculous and you were there to see it

Best.

[TheShitzuofMCA]

this story is so ridiculous I could not make it up if I wanted to. I am not this creative

You win indeed.

[Sean Cash]

the story is true

[Funder Mark]

the story is true

SMH, hard to believe ANYONE is that stupid...

[J.Celifarco]

SMH, hard to believe ANYONE is that stupid...

the change really was the cherry on the top of this **** show sundae

[bsmith]

I used to work with a lady that would make a copy of any cash she had to pass on and then get the person she was giving the cash to to sign the copy to "cover her butt". Can't say I ever saw her copy the change though lol

[Jcoles]

That was not funny smith

[Fundyman]

I told a client to send me his MTD, so the dumbass took PICTURES of his computer screen, from 5 feet away, and sent that over. What other ridiculous stuff have you people run across recently?

Don't even fund that clown ass. Trust me. He'll default in 2 months or less. He really doesn't want to show your the MTD. That's why he did it like that.

[Chambo]

I had a merchant send me in statements...and in the middle of one month, the Merchant title changed to the name of another merchant that had recently defaulted.

When I called him out on this fraud, he simply asked me, "So you need new statements to move forward?"

[J.Celifarco]

I had a merchant send me in statements...and in the middle of one month, the Merchant title changed to the name of another merchant that had recently defaulted.

When I called him out on this fraud, he simply asked me, "So you need new statements to move forward?"

some of these merchants are real pieces of work.. wow

[Michael I]

i asked a merchant if they had any business loans , he told me no . i then see a couple in the statements and this is the merchant response

wbl is a real estate collateral loan
fora is a personal loan
yellowstone i sold my receivables to
richmond i plan on paying off with the money you give me
so again michael i do not have any business loans and not sure what you are referring to

[AlexSMF]

I swear this actually happened, I asked a merchant to send me rent checks, this was maybe 2 years ago.. He neglected to tell me he paid cash. What this genius does is take the $800 or so and put it on a copy machine, made a copy of the money and then faxed me the picture of the cash. You would think this story could not get more ridiculous but no it does. To get to the $800 or so that was his rent included $10 in quarters. I really wish I can find the picture.

Sean Murray, might need you to back me up on this one because the story is that ridiculous and you were there to see it

This one takes the cake. I thought my story of asking for a photo ID and instead being sent a picture that the merchant took of herself was bad. No, this one definitely takes the cake.

[NoBigDeal]

Attachment 1192

actually had a merchant die in between signing contracts and funding call (was about a 24 hour window). the "funny crap" about the situation was the broker asking if they still get their commission on the deal

[TheShitzuofMCA]

Actually a serious question I asked a while back...What happens when someone dies to the funding or agreement?

[nrh1lp]

Well technically their is no guarantor anymore so unless the new owner signs the contract I would assume its void...

[NoBigDeal]

funding a merchant who dies before or after they sign the agreement is kind of like sending your hard-worked file to a broker with a gmail account. Don't expect to see the money again

[TedFundy]

actually had a merchant die in between signing contracts and funding call (was about a 24 hour window). the "funny crap" about the situation was the broker asking if they still get their commission on the deal

That is SAVAGE!

These are hilarious. The best I ever had (which is nothing compared to these) was when I asked my prospect if she ever signed a factoring agreement before. She said- "Welllll umm I dont know, I dont read anything.. I just sign it."

Btw, she somehow owns a semi-profitable business.

SMH

[nrh1lp]

I know this is an older thread but I had to share this... So a merchant replied to an email I sent out requesting docs to go to underwriting and he responds with a picture of his genitalia attached. Happy Friday everybody

[Collection Specialist]

Maybe that's his way of expressing how badly he need a long term loan product.

[HDF]

I know this is an older thread but I had to share this... So a merchant replied to an email I sent out requesting docs to go to underwriting and he responds with a picture of his genitalia attached. Happy Friday everybody

That's a stip at Cresthill

[shieldfunding]

swift has most of their inside sales funding done via mailers and they are well north of $35 million monthly funding form inside sales

That's a bold statement. I'm sure there are others on here who will beg to differ. Long standing debate on DF...

[RainmakersLeads]

True, swift mails heavy! And Swifts Mail Pc is Trash. Terrible Print quality, paper, Cheap.. and they still kill it! They are consistent. We get 2 almost every month to a coupe of our family corps. Direct Mail is where it's at in Business Funding / Lending, and a few other verticals. Has been since I started marketing via Direct Mail in '98 (I was a kid then and was mentored by Legends in the travel industry, mega money! (they own American Top Team Also) Problem is it takes a consistent investment, done right, and time. Most owners, CEO, CMO's etc are shortsighted and have Attention deficit, and decide to take live transfers.. when transfers build a weak book in comparison, renew at a lower rate, (much lower) much lower avg Deal size. Etc. mail is King, and those with short arms and deep pockets will keep loosing out! Granted you never put your Marketing spend in 1 basket... but the people that are quietly winning and happy no one else is in the mailbox. You gotta spend minimum $40-60k per month (bigger shops spend that per week+) on mail and 20k on Xfers. That will get you 200-300 inbounds per week. Anyone that tried mail, and is Salty.. either mailed with the wrong company and/or didn't mail the minimums to see the results and in essence go Whale Hunting! GN all!

[Funder Mark]

We told an ISO we need the application to be dated, genius sends it back dated 3 WEEKS from now!!!

[SCFunding]

What an awesome thread... The one with change in a scan is absolutely hilarious!

I have too many to post. So many morons.